Dad died just over six years ago now. I won't pretend that I think of him every single day, because I don't think I do. My mother does think him every day; probably every hour. Everything in her life reminds her of something to do with him. Every month holds a dozen anniversaires; every day a thousand tiny micro jolts of memory.
So no, I don't think of him like that. I don't even, as I used to, see something, read something, hear something and think "I must ask Daddy about that". I do, however, often reflect on things he said, habits he had, aphorisms of his and wonder at how wise he was. (Most of the time; occasionally he got it spectacularly wrong!) I've passed many of his nuggets to my children. Among them:
- Never trust any group who gesture en masse above their heads with a hand shaped like a fist or a slap. Mass violence shows itself.
- Try as hard as you like, but never LOOK as though you're trying. It smacks of desperation and scares people.
- Swear to release pressure. Don't swear AT people. It's unattractive and violent.
- Be nice to every single person you ever meet. It's good breeding. Only ill-mannered oafs feel that there are people of lower status than they, and they can be unpleasant to them.
- If something's worth doing, it's worth doing well. If it's not worth doing, don't do it at all.
- Be yourself. If you try and be someone else, you'll be uncomfortable and you'll always get found out.
- Your body is ony a vessel to carry around your brain. It's nice to have a pretty box, but the present is more important.
Happy Father's Day, everyone.
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