About ten days after I posted last I got an email from the agent whom I really wanted to represent me. She gave me some really good feedback; said that she thought I was a very good writer, that I had an excellent USP for my book and all sorts of other flattering stuff.
She went on to say, however, that she really didn't like my central character, finding her too selfish to be sympathetic, she found the fact that I dart around in time and between voices without waving enough flags confusing and that I should head up each chapter with time and person. She said that she was therefore going to pass on the book but if I changed it substantially in accordance with these considerations she would look at it again. That was on Friday and I was really disappointed. Contrary to my normal practice I didn't respond immediately and spent some time wondering whether a) I should do as she suggested or b) explain myself or c) gracefully thank her for her feedback and move on.
I thought about it on a lot of long icy dog-walks and I concluded that I didn't want to change the book as she suggested. I also decided that there was no point in getting back to her.
But I couldn't help myself, so I emailed her back and described why I didn't feel I could make the changes she suggested. I explained why, perhaps misguidedly, I had deliberately chosen to write the book in the way that I had. I pointed to the chapter which held the key to the whole thing, structurally and thematically. I thought I sounded like a disappointed child, but I couldn't stop myself. Then I told her about my new project, outlined it briefly and asked her if she'd like to see it when it was finished.
Then I forgot about it.
And later that night she emailed me back, said that she'd reread the first few chapters and decided that actually it was very good, and "hey - let's go for it". She'd take me on and represent the book as it was, unrevised! (If no one had jumped in in the interim... as if!!)
I actually jumped up and down and screamed. I scared the dogs and the kids. And then I said 'yes, please!' She sent me a formal offer and I signed and sent it back. And now I am represented! I have an agent. I can say "my agent". I am unreasonably happy! I have just been away skiing and realised that I haven't the faintest idea what happens next. But I'm calling her tomorrow to have a chat and hopefully arrange to meet.
Maybe it is true that the darkest hour is just before the dawn.
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